Wednesday, October 12, 2011

Jethro plans to drag me KICKING AND SCREAMING to New York City!!!

He's really gonna do it.  He's gonna talk me into it.

When I tell people he's taking me to NYC with him in a couple weeks, I get reactions like "Oh wow you are so lucky!" and "Woo hoo glamorous jet set life" and the sarcastic kind of "Yeah poor you, being forced to go to the most fabulous/ glamorous/ famous city in the world."

Are you friggen kidding me?  Hello, that city is full of people.   Like, wall-to-wall people.  And I bet 89% of them are bigger than me!  It's all loud there and like, polluted probably, and loud, and you can't see the sky unless you look straight up, right?  And if you believe what you see on TV everybody gets mugged at least once a day.  I've never been mugged in my life.  I'm not even sure exactly what it involves but I'm pretty sure I don't want it happening to me!

But, I'm going to NYC because he wants to take me with him.  

Sigh.  I know, I know.  I'm lucky.  Being this guy's wife has meant going places I never expected to see.  I come from a long line of farm families for whom an overnight stay is next to impossible.  I can't say I didn't want to see different parts of the world.  It's just that as a kid, I never expected it.

Most of all, I'm just not a city person.

Jethro is going to the Audio Engineering Society Convention.  He's never been to one, ever, in over 20 years, because he's always been... you know, working. Doing that audio engineering thing that he does. He's going this year because he's presenting a speech.  If he's gonna go he's gonna go big.  That's just how he operates.

He'll be doing a talk on How He Plans To Revolutionize The Way Music Is Recorded.

Don't ask me, man, all I know is I had to go to Montreal with him so he could listen to two versions of a song on a machine that doesn't dither the sample rate conversion...digital file...non-pro-tools... um, thingie.

Bottom line, for me, is the chance to spend four days with my man.  I am, after all, the president of his fan club.  I gotta be there.

It means leaving the farm though.  And by that I mean, I have to leave the teenagers and grandparents here - man I hope the kids are going to be okay, taking care of the grandparents, haha.  The kids will be responsible for a dog, a house cat, two barn cats and three horses.  There will have to be some arranging to get everybody to the bus stop, and to an early morning band practice.  I'm lucky to have teenagers who actually have a clue about how to do stuff.

Can you imagine if this was an actual working farm?  Like with 100 dairy cows?  Yikes.  It's hard enough to leave here. I know it'll be okay because we've gone away before.  But it always worries me a little.

So.  Little Hick in NYC.

Can I get excited about this?  I hear there are some pretty big art museums in NYC.  I'd like to see that.

Jethro thinks I should set up some lunch dates with literary agents.  I clamped down a bitter laugh.  It don't work that way, folks.  I mean, it would be nice.  What would I do to meet JANETREID the Shark Herself?  That would be awesome!!  But that's not how it works.  Instead I think I'll just get my picture taken with the front door of the building her office is in.  Close enough?

My American writer friends tell me I won't get mugged.  Probably.

And in case you wondered... Yes I will most likely be wearing at least one article of clothing with a John Deere logo on it.  What else would I wear?

So if you live in NYC, and for some odd reason you are reading this, if you happen to see a smallish woman wearing clothes with pictures of green tractors, clinging to the arm of a large man, staring up at buildings in slack jawed amazement, yep, that'll be me.


Heidi Willis said...

First off, it isn't Punkeydoodles, but it isn't THAT crowded. On TV they make it look like it's wall to wall people, but it's not that bad. You have breathing space. :)

Secondly, this is something they won't tell you, but some of the museums around Central Park, will tell you there's a entrance fee - something like $20. But that is just a SUGGESTED donation - you can pay however much you want (or nothing). Watch the New Yorkers ahead of you. Most will just walk in. We always pay a little, but if we actually had to pay 20 bucks a person we'd never go!

Walk through Central Park. It's free, and there's lots of open space and sky. Walk across the Brooklyn Bridge - that's free and such a cool thing to do. And make peace with the subway.It's a great and inexpensive (and fast) way to get around. It looks scary and it's not all that user friendly if you've never done it, but ask people and they'll help you. People are actually mostly really friendly. And once you do it once, you'll have it down.

I've never been mugged. :) Have such a blast there. And bring back lots of pictures!!

Auntie said...

Have a fantastic time, Heidi. This is your turn to do something different ... just the two of you and, uh, many New Yorkers! Good luck to Jethro on the speech. I will eagerly anticipate the Heidi Report after you get back.

Paul Tee said...

Good for Jethro.

Nice to get away, have a great time.

Anonymous said...

Live in the moment Heidi and wear that green logo proudly, heck you may even start a new fashion trend....farm wear for city peoples....carhart here they come!! Ha!!!!