If your cat went deaf, how would you know?

It's not like he ever came bounding into the room when I called him...

Last month I was convinced that we were losing him forever. All he did was sleep, eat, and go to the box. I mean, more intensely than usual. He just didn't look right. It looked like it took all his strength to jump onto his food table.

I was getting ready to say goodbye.

In tears, I laid down on the rug beside him and rubbed his chin. He purred and reached out his paw to my cheek, like he always has. "Will you stick around a little bit longer, please Nigel?" He winked at me. "Just a little longer, okay? We'll give you lots of good food and a little mat on top of the heat vent to sleep on. I'll keep the obnoxious dog away from you. You can curl up on my desk beside me and if you want you can sleep in my lap while I type. Can you stay alive for me?" I ran my hand down his bony back. Every vertebrae stands out, his hips and shoulders sharp under my hands. He's not the handsome and proud black cat he was ten years ago. But he's still himself.

He rubbed his wet nose against the side of my hand. Then he closed his eyes, as the purring faded and he fell asleep. I stayed there watching him to make sure he was still breathing. I've gotten into that habit lately, always pausing to see his ribs rise and fall as he sleeps.

Now for the last two weeks he's perked up a bit. He hasn't gained any weight, and he won't sleep on our beds anymore, but he's back to standing at the top of the steps and meowing at us.

I miss him at night. After fifteen years of falling asleep with my purring friend, I feel disoriented. He's making up for it though, by sitting on my lap while I type. He's here right now, watching my fingers with his special kind of detachment. I can feel his purring chest against my forearm. I've got the tunes going, so I can't hear him, but it doesn't matter; I don't think he hears much anymore. I've never been able to sneak up on him but he startles easily these days.

He's a faded version of himself, physically, but in every way he's still the cool cat he was in his youth. I hope he feels good enough to live longer. Could I ask him for another year? It's up to him.

If his old bones are too stiff for him to jump onto my bed, I'm quite happy to have him hang around with me at my desk. There's room for both of us.




So, kids, if you ever see something like this

fg ghlk5555544444444444444444444444444444444444444444 neeeeeeeede;xzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

... it's just my groovy old cat making a statement!