Thursday, December 08, 2005

Hick Fashion: You need flannel

Obviously, when you think hick, you think flannel. And with good reason, because this is one of the best fabrics ever invented, people. Highly underrated in the non-hick, citified world. It's soft, it's warm, and it feels good. Consider: pajamas. Cotton is okay in the summer, but flannel is the real thing. Any synthetic is totally wrong for your jammies. It's just wrong. It's as wrong as polyester men's underwear, which I've never seen but have read about in a textile book, and even in the 70's it was quickly discovered to be horrible. Natural fibres, that's what you've got to get.

As far as hick fashion is concerned, the first thing that comes to mind is the classic plaid shirt. My first advice to you is, avoid the printed plaid. Spend the bux, get the woven plaid. A good garment is worth spending the cash on, I don't care who you are, it's still true. I of course love the go junking in the thrift stores- just make sure the old shirt isn't smelly. Laundry as we know it is one of the true great inventions of the 20th century but sometimes a bad smell has to stay in the thrift store. Even if you'll be wearing it out to the barn. Don't even inflict your critters with the mung.

Did you know you can buy jeans lined in flannel? I've seen them at LLBean and Mark's Work Wearhouse. Guess what? Apparently you can only get them in men's sizes. GRrrr. Isn't that sizeist? Don't we 5ft tall 120-or-so-lb people deserve to stay warm too? I should speak to somebody about this.

Another word about flannel: get the thick stuff. The cheap stuff eventually wears thin and then it's not soft and warm anymore.

As for jammies, avoid winnie the pooh or anything that will remind the person you're sleeping with of disturbing shows he/she was forced to watch as a child. Big turn off. I could be convinced to be okay with superheroes. but that's another story. My own Mr Incredible likes my pink jammies with the coffee mugs all over them. I hate coffee. I wear the java for him. And they're pink and flannel so they rate.

So there you have it- flannel is good to wear for many occasions: to bed, to town, to the barn. Just please, not the same flannel garment to all those locations. That's also horribly wrong. And we'll talk about appropriate apparel for different occasions and locations later. Aren't you glad you stopped in today!


fatrobot said...

flannel shirts need a bit of hay in the pockets i think

Heidi the Hick said...

Actually, that happens almost automatically. You don't have to work too hard at it.

Xtin said...

MmmmMMm flannel. There's just something naughty about it, too. No-one talks about that. Which is great, because you can get your kicks and everyone else thinks you're all wholesome 'n' everything ...

Heidi the Hick said...

I'm so glad you said that!

Rocky (Racquel) said...

Just surfed in - Love your blog!!