H the Heidi Magazine
On the front cover: Heidi and her friend Oakie dress up for a fun Christmas picture. Oakie is a 12 year old QH mare at the Little Valley and will be foaling in the spring!
HOW TO LIVE THROUGH THE HOLIDAYS!
Don't lie, we all know that the most wonderful time of the year is also the most pain in the butt, stressful, panic inducing, tear jerking, pressure filled, cold dark saddest time of the year. Just admit it and we'll all feel better.
But we don't have to be miserable! Here are some of H Magazine's survive-and-thrive strategies!
1) Get lazy.
No Christmas lights up? Yeah, well. So you won't get your name in the paper for having the biggest light display on your street. You'll be happy in January when you're not up on a ladder taking them down.
Got kids? See if you can get them to decorate. They might not do it perfectly but does that really matter if they did their best? Are photographers from our glossy sister publication, H at home and in the barn coming to do a photo session at your house, which requires you to have everything looking perfect? I think not. (At least, I didn't send them!)
Money problems? Tell everybody they're getting an orange for Christmas, just like kids did in the olden days, then watch their pleasant surprise when they actually get a nice book or CD of their favourite band from you instead. (You are supporting the publishing and music industries with your dollars, right? Right?)
2) Don't pig out
It's time for all that special candy and big meals and bowls full of little snacky things. EAT THEM. By all means, eat! Enjoy! But, don't stuff your face. Don't inhale like you're saving it up for later.
Sit down for your fancy celebratory meal, and savour every bite. Just take one spoonful less of everything. By the time you've cleared the plate, chances are you'll be satisfied. We always think we need more food than we really do. And besides, you wanna save room in your belly for dessert!
3) Go for a walk
I'm not saying you shouldn't watch "Elf" again. Golly heck, is that Will Ferrell funny? He is darn funny. But after you put "The Sound of Music" away, get your butt off the couch and go for a walk. You can even hum about brown paper packages tied up in string while you go for a stroll. Get some snowflakes on noses! Get outta the house. Then watch "How the Grinch stole Christmas" again. Then make a snow angel before settling in for "Charlie Brown Christmas."
4) Don't shoot your eye out.
We know you love your new Red Rider BB Gun but seriously, don't point that thing at me.
5) If you get invited to a party, go, have fun, and look awesome!
I mean, don't get all twisted up about it... just wear something you know you look good in. And then rock it like it's never been rocked before!
Hopefully you won't have to go that formal though. It's just as much fun, possibly more, to go creatively casual.
6) Throw an imaginary Christmas party!
It's fun and much less work than a real party. You can invite people all over the world and don't have to clean your bathroom! Your guests will only know you're still in your pajamas if you tell them! Plus all the food is imaginary, so you can eat as much as you want and not feel a thing. No garbage, no money spent, everybody's happy.
Great gifts for the Critters in your life!
Oh you have got to be kidding. You really think your cat cares what day it is? I'll be lucky if my little-old-man-cat wakes up for presents! But I know we all have a soft spot for our furry friends. That's why H the Heidi Magazine has compiled a list of presents for critters!
-stinky chewy bones
-stinky chewy toys
-a nice soft rope tuggy toy (preferably stinky)
-those cardboard tubes inside the roll of wrapping paper
-a bed (preferably YOURS)
-a nice soft cat bed to curl up in
-a nice spot of sunshine to sprawl out in
-a cardboard box to hide in
-ripped up wrapping paper
-string (after untying it from your brown paper packages)
-multi level cat climbing structure (aka Christmas tree)
- tree ornaments
-those little horse cookies they give away at horse shows that you throw in the tack box and forget about- they're probably still good but you might want to check first
-the other horse's halter to chew on
I love critters. They're possibly the easiest people to please in your entire life.
Special Fashion Feature: Winter Wear!
STAY ON YOUR WARM TOES
Available in most department stores; look for boy's sizes if you're small like me!
GOTTA HAND IT TO YA
USE YOUR HEAD
Your mom was right- don't forget a hat!
Cover it all: these thermal coveralls will protect you from the cold. If I'd had two pairs I'd have taken one home to town and wore them to walk the kids to school. And go to the grocery store. I could be wearing this from November til April!
Under where? Under there, and they're long! Thermal underwear aren't just for lumberjacks anymore! In the women's section they're now available in pink, black and powder blue as well as many different prints. Just because they're hidden under your clothes doesn't mean they have to be boring!
Here, our Iggy Pop lookalike is rocking the classic red union suit. I do not have anything like this but it is one of my life's goals to wear this in the future! The one-piece design means no more fumbling around in a morning haze for something warm to wear under your jeans and hoodie. Just step in, button up, and get dressed.
And for those of you who have always believed that long johns are not sexy... we've got news for you...
Red union suit from longunderwearsales.com; buff dude in long johns, no idea, doesn't really matter, but heck he's for sure warm enough, eh?
GREAT FOOD FOR THE HOLIDAYS
Here are Heidi's favourite tips for eating well:
1) have friends who are awesome cooks and beg them to visit you, bringing food. Bribe them if you have to.
2) Go to Mom's. She's so good at feeding people.
3) Those kids are old enough to cook now, aren't they?
4) Hello? Pizzaville? Remember me?
5) Ohhhh honey.... Darling? Sweet hunk of heavenly manliness? You know what I want for Christmas? A handsome man in the kitchen! Heck yes I meant you...!
6) Christmas party? Are they serving snacks?
7) Yay! Leftovers!
WHAT I KNOW FOR SURE
I really don't want to be feeling the stress at Christmas. I have a feeling that the only person who can do anything about this... is me.
I have to know my limits, I have to know my priorities and I have to stick to it.
This time of year can be incredibly difficult for so many of us and I often wonder how much of it is self-induced. Sure, we can blame the media and the corporate giants of shopping; we can point the finger at every god of consumerism, but when it comes right down to it, are we letting it all get to us?
Sometimes we have to make choices and compromises. This year, I refuse to feel bad about not keeping up the standards. I'm not sure who decided that houses must be seasonally decorated, or that kids need five gifts each under the tree. If that made me happy, I'd do it. What makes me happy is peace. I want to snuggle up and watch our favourite movies, read together, laugh, and go for walks in the snow. I want to sit down with my favourite people to a meal cooked with care. I want to hang around in the barn with my furry horses. I am looking forward to going to church on Christmas Eve.
In there somewhere, there will be opening of gifts. I hope I chose items that my loved ones will find beautiful or useful or both!
I don't want to be standing in a line up at a cash register, or in a car stuck at a red light. I don't want to be bursting into tears because the tablecloth doesn't match the tree skirt.
It's what I choose to make it. This year, instead of letting the stress get to me, I'm going to choose peace!