Gilbert Grape is a Hick Too!

Did a little impulsive video store shopping yesterday. I hear laughter is the best medicine so I got the Holy Grail, since I hadn't seen it since about 1989, and my daughter watched it at a friend's and thought it was hilarious. She's 11. But I digress. There was a copy of "What's Eating Gilbert Grape" and I said to myself, man, for 9.99 I must take these people home with me.
Anybody who's a regular around here may already know about my little Johnny Depp thing. Actually the whole reason for tonight's entry is an excuse to mention his name. Johnny Depp. Ah I feel much better now. However it's not quite what you think, because while lots of his fans dream of unmentionable passions and lusts, I dream of drawing funny cartoons with him, and having long discussions about how weird our dreams are, and how weird it is that we have similar dreams, as I gaze lovingly and he tells me how incredibly cool I am. And then we giggle about the secret of our identical brain matter. Or something.

Anyways, it has occurred to me before that my pal Johnny is, in real life, a little bit like me. Sure he's done the whole supermodel-girlfriend-hotel-room-trashing-jet-set-red-carpet thing and I have not. Oh wait! I'm so wrong about that-I HAVE done the red carpet thing, last year! Only it was in Winnipeg and not one person asked me who I thought I was, which really bummed me out, so I guess that doesn't count. Uh, the point, hidden in there, is that my buddy Johnny is a bit of a hick himself. Seriously. Florida? Kentucky? Blowing things up in Colorado with Hunter S Thompson? Living among kids and gardens and Vanessa in the south of France? He's a hick.

And one of the things I dug about Gilbert Grape was the decrepit house in the sticks and the gloriously shook up old truck. I am a sucker for that stuff every time. Ya ya I know, Gilbert's a character and Johnny's real, whatevs, I am writing this after downing a nice beer and may look it over in the morning and wonder what the hell is going on here. Honestly, even with my poor typing skills I don't think I've ever taken this long to write a blog column. GEez. Okay one more time before I fall into bed, cheap pathetic drunk that I am. Johnny Depp. Much better. G'nite!