Saturday, February 26, 2011

Celebrities behaving badly, 400 lbs of horse manure, and snow.

Let's see what we can learn from this:

Kids, don't let the manure build up as a result of cleaning out the stalls and not taking it out of the barn for a couple days or so.  I had a good reason for not taking it out.  It was extremely windy last week and I really didn't want to take a chance that the contents of the wheelbarrow would end up in my face.  You understand, eh?  By the beginning of this week, the wheelbarrow was full, as well as the blue plastic tub with rope handles (which I dragged across the snow when the wheelbarrow couldn't get through) and the barrel I usually keep shredded paper in was full.  Then I started forking the stuff up against the wall behind the stalls.  I was disgusted with myself!  I let it get that bad!  It started to look like a credit card debt, you know, like it just keeps getting bigger and then you can't face it and it gets bigger and bigger!

Well I went at it this week.  It took a few hours, but I went slow.

Now.  Let's talk about FAMOUS BAD BEHAVIOUR.

-don't get punk in drublic.

-shut your mouth.

-girls, skirts must cover your butt, and please learn how to get out of a car.

-Don't call radio station talk shows when you're hammered!

-actually don't call radio talk shows at all.

-never insult your boss in a public, easily accessible medium.

-don't steal stuff

-hookers are not babysitters

-seriously, shut your mouth.  Just stop talking.

And as for snow?  As much as I complain that I'm tired of the cold, and everything is more difficult in the snow, I wish I could show you what the yard looks like tonight.  Big flakes have been drifting out of the black sky for a few hours, just ambling their way down.  No hurry.  Everything is sparkling.

It's sparkling outside.

So how can I complain?

Sure I get irritated when I watch the news, and people who think they are too special to follow the rules are hogging all the attention (I mean, geez, the really important news is about HAIRCUTS right?).

And I don't ever want to bitch about cleaning out the barn, because guess what - horse manure only shows up where there are horses!  And I love my horses.

And I would like to not worry about snow every time I get into my truck, worry about my husband driving home, and all that.  Stumbling through the snow drifts to walk the Pug is... not working well.  Winter wears thin right about this time of year.


(Also.  OSCAR tomorrow night!!!!!!!!)


Anonymous said...

I actually like the snow cause it covers up all the horse manure I haven't yet gotten to, which is pretty much all of it out in the paddocks anyway. Oie, when spring comes girl, I am in sooooooo much doo-doo, hah, literally.....sigh


Paul Tee said...

I too get tired of shoveling horse manure. It's a thankless, soul-draining task. People around you take it for granted, rarely lifting a finger to help. Do they think it will simply evaporate by itself?

Wait, I don't have horses.

Then where does all this s**t come from?

Hold it. My mass spectrograph confirms that it isn't horse manure but common garden variety BS. Tons of it. Produced right here in my household, far in excess of the national average.

And let me tell you Heidi, it is far denser, more stink-ripe than what your friends are producing on a healthy diet of full-fiber hay.

Angela said...

I've been absent lately.. did you adopt Oakie??

Diamond in the ruff said...

Let me start by complimenting you on your blog, I love it!!!
I feel for you with the manure...
Come visit my blog @

Nicole McInnes said...

Good reminder, Heidi. Especially since I just broke up with Winter on my blog.


Heidi the Hick said...

Nicole, I'm thinking of breaking up with winter too!!! I mean how much hassle can a girl take, right?

Thanks, Diamond, and I'll visit later today

Angela, she's still on a free-lease for the winter, and in the spring I pay for her. And then she's mine!!

Paul, you always crack me up, you wise man!! (or is that wise ass??!?!!!

Mommyrides - Yep, I hear you...I'll be borrowing the tractor with the loader soon. When the snow melts, um, everything else does too!