Yer darn right I watched that big wedding!

While I'm not a HUGE ROYALIST  (my father-in-law, "Grandpar," who left England in the 60s to get away from all these things, would be horrified...) I do like the Queen.  She just seems like a really together chick, you know?

And I hear she stomps around her country place in wellies.  (That would be British for rubber boots.)

So, there ya go.



Yay, Princes!  Aren't they adorable.  Harry looks like he's snickering and Will actually looks reasonably calm.  I cannot imagine how weird it would be to get married with half the world watching.  Like, no pressure.  Wait.  Yes, PRESSURE!

Okay, so we got the princes, who are all decked up in these incredibly ornate uniforms.

And then Kate gets out of the Bentley and she looks beautiful.  It's like she got training on how to be a royal bride. Oh yes that's right... she has gotten training.  Heck, Will's had his whole life to be trained.

Confession: I squeezed out a couple of tears.  

I LOVE WEDDINGS!  (DRINKS ALL ROUND!)

My mom got to see this before leaving for work.  "Oh and her train isn't even 40 ft long," she wept, since we had been talking about how sensible Kate seems to be.  Okay, sensible in relation to your average colossal royal wedding.

This just isn't a good year to be super flashy, what with the recessions and global lack of cash.  

Pretty!  Elegant!  

By this time, Harry is fidgeting and sweating and looking like he's more nervous than the groom.  Do we kinda love Harry?  He's done some boneheaded moves but he grins a lot.  

Will didn't get to actually watch her come down the aisle but had to stand there waiting until she got right up beside him.  Is that a thing in Britain or just for royal people?  Wow.  Self-control.  Harry turned around for a peek though, and apparently said to his brother,  "Wait till you see her."

And then, also apparently, according to those who are good at reading lips, Will said "You look beautiful."  I'm not so good at reading lips but I can read dudes, and he gave her a quick but thorough looking-over.  Oh yes.  

It was cute... they sort of whispered little things to each other like they'd just met for coffee or something.  Hello darling.  You look handsome.  Thank you honey, you're quite slamming yourself today.  Oh you rogue, my dad is standing here.  Cheeky aren't you?  Ha, you just wait.  

It was a very formal and serious ceremony.  It was an hour long.  I'm twitching and trying to keep my eyes open by then. I do know one of the men in robes stood in a little crow's nest and gave a wonderful speech/ sermon, but I sure as heck can't remember a word of it.  Luckily nobody fell asleep in church while being televised.

Know what I love about this lady?  Her crooked smile.  She always looks like she's choking down a good snicker.  I also have an instant kinship with other crooked-faced women.  Her eyebrows are different, and she's unique, and besides, symmetry is so overrated. 

Then of course the ring doesn't go on smoothly.  It never does. The groom always stands there wrestling with it while everyone else holds their breath.  

Not the Queen though.  

Always chill.

Do you think Prince Philip is a total scream in real life?  He looks kind of jokey.  He also looks pretty darn good - he's turning 90 next month!!  (His eldest son, sitting right there beside him, doesn't really look that much younger... maybe Charles has had a more stressful life...!)

Oh Will, so thoughtful and serious and oh my gosh, I AM OLD.  I remember when this guy was born.  I remember when he was a little chubby cheeked toddler with yellow hair.  And now look at him.  He's tall and his hair is thinning!  He's a MAN, man!

So yeah.  I'm old.  

Another thing I like: she wore her hair down, so she looked like herself.  

I think she's good at this thing.

Let's look at this again:  

I think she looks more comfortable than he does.  

 Notice how there seems to be a proper way to hold hands, a proper way to walk?  

But no slight little wave, the twist from the wrist.  Maybe only the Queen waves that way.  What if there's a way to wave that only the Queen gets to use?

Maybe it takes a few years of being the Queen to get it right.

Lots of waving.  

 Mother, Grandmother and Step-mother all wearing proper British lady hats and nice non-offensive pastels.  

Left to right:

 I am standing beside the Queen of England.  Well done.

I AM the Queen of England.

My hat is sideways?  Mrs Middleworth's hat is too.  Or is it Middlemore?  We look like we called each other this morning.  

Well aren't they a charming group.  I'd love to know what they're chatting about in real life.  Nice wedding.  Mm, yes.  My backside is rather numb after sitting for an hour.  Not to worry dear.  Very soon your feet will go numb from standing.  Later your face will be numb from smiling.  Buck up, ladies.  

Man she must be a tough ol lady.

You know how I suspect Prince Philip to be the life of the party?  Check him out here, putting the charm on Kate's sister.  

Oh Pippa.  Watch out for that ol feller.  

So the new Duchess walks out, looks around and we can see her going, "Oh wow."  Understatement.  There was a carpet of people in front of them.  

 Then they had to do the little peck on the lips.

And these two are so racy they kissed TWICE!  Them kids today, eh?

Well I had to go out to the barn so I didn't see the next part.  I hear William took his new wife for a drive in his dad's antique Aston Martin.  

Well, sure that's cool - you know I love cars.  I think Jethro and I did one better though.  We got driven through town in the back of a 1955 Ford F-100 pickup truck!  That rocked.  

I wonder if my wedding dress still fits.  It did on our tenth anniversary, but that was almost ten years ago.  I'm not good with numbers, but this is our twentieth anniversary coming up in the summer.  

I feel another ride in the back of a truck coming on.

My 16 year old daughter is madly in love with a 32 year old English rock musician. Should I be concerned?

If she's going to be crazy about a musician, I guess it's okay to be infatuated with Matthew Bellamy of Muse.

Oh she is most definitely in love.  Her brother says she's crossed the line into creepystalker mode.  She knows his birth date, where he was born, where he lived when he formed the band and what age he and his bandmates were at that time.  She knows when his girlfriend (you might have heard of her - Kate Hudson?) will be having their baby.  She knows where the band's studio is (not exactly but general vicinity!) and she has researched their discography thoroughly, right down to live records and DVDs. So far, she owns three studio albums plus one live CD/DVD package.  She can connect a Muse reference from any conversation.  Every time she's on FB she posts a Muse lyric.  She has racked up hours and ridiculous hours on YouTube watching their videos and then when she'd seen all the music videos she started watching interviews, and now she has memorized her favourite musician's accent, facial ticks, and his funny laugh.  She has tons of pictures in her file on the computer.  (I don't know where she got that habit from ahemjohnnydepp.)

She loves him.  She adores his habit of wearing shiny suits on stage. She thinks it's awesome that he intends for Muse to be the first rock band to play in outer space. She loves his crazy fast talking, she loves his singing voice, she loves his pretty blue eyes.  Everything the guy does, in her opinion, is either funny, cute, or amazing.

It's pretty healthy.  She respects and admires his talent.  She's in awe of him, of the fact he sings, plays piano, plays guitar - quite shreddingly and energetically - as well as writes and produces.  He also fiddles with modifying his guitars and has had a hand in designing some freaky new guitars. Her guy Matt is genuinely talented.

(Yep, that does appear to be a keytar.  The guy's got guts.)

It's serious.  She is even more in love with him than she was with her first big infatuation....

Eicca Toppinen of Apocalytica.  I didn't think it was possible for a girl to be more obsessed than she was with this guy, but she's gone on to a whole other range with Matt Bellamy. Eicca is still a hero, and always will be because she is very loyal.  But Bellamy's her guy now.

I do think the kid has good taste.


And I can agree about the pretty blue eyes.

I'm partly to blame for this obsession.  I've liked this band for years and have a very clear memory of turning right in the subdivision on my way to our house when this intense haunting and rock-thumping song played on the radio.  You know how every now and then you hear a song that speeds your heart rate, stands your hairs on end and covers you in goosebumps?  And it's good?  That's what "Time Is Running Out" did to me. Other singles always got turned up when we heard them.  When That Twilight Movie came out, and I took Annyong and her friend to the theatre to see it, us three and a whole bunch more screaming girls and their mothers, and like, three uncomfortable looking guys, we were totally squealing when "Supermassive Black Hole" played over the slightly goofy baseball scene.

(Because Muse is also Stephenie Meyer's favourite band... Annyong is all, "I knew that band before the Twi-hards claimed them!!")

So I really dug this band.  Of course, me, I always fall for the bass player with the puppy dog eyes.  That's him, on the left.  Swoon.

Of course that cute little drummer on the right is adorable too eh?  Darn Englishmen.  

Anyways.  Why I'm to blame: This past Christmas I picked out a Muse CD for her.  "Black Holes And Revelations." It's got some heavy singles on it.  I hadn't heard the whole album before, and when we listened to it in its entirety, we were all impressed.  Heavily impressed.  And of course that set up the whole THING.

It all went CRAAAAAZY after that.  You know nobody does crazy like a 16 year old girl, especially when that girl is half ME.  She never had a chance.  Falling in love with musicians comes naturally to her.  Poor kid. 

Muse really are an incredible band.  They're not nearly as well known here in North America as over in Europe.  (Hey, fellow North Americans - what the heck is generally wrong with us over here???!!!)

No really, are these guys too weird for us?  They're just perfectly weird enough in our house...

Look, even Jethro is a fan of this band.  And he doesn't give it away easily.

After that, the Girl HAD TO HAVE the most recent record, "The Resistance."  I bought it but we made a deal that she'd shovel out the open shed in the barn to work it off.  Then she had to have "Absolution" so as a result I have a nice clean barn.  Total win-win.  So far, other than constantly nagging the kid to shut down the YouTube, this little Muse fixation has been okay for me!  Although, from now on she's got to bring her own money with her because I'm running out of barn chores for her to do.

Oh, and she also batted her beautiful eyes at her Daddy, gave him $20 and asked him to pay the other $10 so she could have the live package, "HAARP".

She also has the Resistance songbook.  You should see this sheet music - it's gorgeous.  Seriously, I've never seen music notes looking like art. She asked the webmaster of their site if she could photocopy it and use it as wallpaper; a guy emailed back and figured it would be okay!

She gets frustrated that she struggles to play the music.  I tell her that I doubt Matt Bellamy learned how to play Chopin soon after learning to walk.  I tell her I'm sure Matt Bellamy plays piano and plays guitar every day.  It's called practice.  I tell her if she wants to honour her favourite musician she should practice and play his music well!

I'm just trying to put some positivity into an obsession I sort of kickstarted.

But it could be worse, right?

I mean, he's quite unattainable and quite taken, so it's a totally harmless, and I'd argue even healthy crush.

He's obviously an inspiration.

He's this serious musician, slightly bad-boy as a good rock star should be, but also kinda goofy and funny.

In general, they're just a bunch of lovely young fellas, aren't they?  Absolutely charming.

Sigh.  They'd probably fit right in around here.




Most of all I approve because he's hardworking and talented.  That's the kind of person I want my kids, either of them, to emulate and admire.

Having said that, I got my stinkeye on any of those gangly zit faced punkasses in her music class.  I'm just sayin'.

EASTER (this is worth sharing)

God, we live in a world of Good Fridays where innocent ones suffer and the vulnerable are crushed.  Our own lives are cluttered with unfulfilled dreams, deep longings, vague but persistent dis-ease.  We too stand trembling at the grave, wondering where the hallelujahs are and if resurrection can be believed, much less trusted.


Lord, you have promised that if we seek you with all our hearts, we will find you.  So here in this space of quiet and rest, we listen for your voice.  Today, we name and offer to you the doubts and fears, the questions and disbelief that make it difficult for us to see the risen Jesus and the life he offers.  


This was in the church bulletin this morning.  I don't know who wrote it.  I just needed to share it.

Mud. Only it's not just mud. If you know what I mean.

Long ago in a different kind of life, I loved mud.  I squished it between my fingers and formed it into shapes, which I then put into a fire until those shapes were hard.

Yeah, it was fun, but my future already included one career notorious for being a hard living.

So I gave up the clay thing.

These days, I curse the clay on a regular basis.  Like, daily.

When it's dry, it's rock hard, much like those pots became after sitting on a shelf for a few days.  When it's wet, it's a sticky, slick, sucking mess - much like those pots became after I decided they weren't good enough to fire and tossed 'em into the wet clay bin.  When clay is so dry it's powdered, anything with nostrils is in danger of getting a case of silicosis.  Potter's lung. How about riding instructor's lung?

I just don't love mud like I used to.

Right now I can't look at the corral without disgust.  It's wet.  Most of it is a six-inch deep bog of manure and wasted hay.  Three sets of hooves churn it into a blackened stinking mess pocked with dark poisonous looking water.  The horses sink to the fetlocks with every step and I worry about tendons and stifles.

Have I ever mentioned that spring is NOT  my favourite time of year?

I'm not proud of this, but I have not yet been on horseback this year.  I can't face it.  I don't want to sink to the ankles before I even get onto my horse's back. I hate thinking of the result if the horse slipped in the mud and landed on top of me. I keep thinking I could finally get these horses out of the corral, out onto the hay field and down the road, except that two out of three are not very road and trail experienced yet... and after a long winter is really not the best time to try it out.  I won't ride in the pasture because the grass is too young and the ground too soft.

Also.  It doesn't smell very nice outside right now.

One of my neighbours will be over this week with his skid steer loader and all that crap will be pushed out and over the hill.  Then that clay will at least be just mean ol' clay, without the nasty layer on top.

I hate spring.

I like my neighbour.

We are going to talk more here about the best kind of footing for a riding area.  I'm kind of obsessed with the concept and I'd like to hear other horse-people thoughts on the subject.  Next I'll tell you about The Estimate for turning this corral into a well drained, non-dusty, reliable riding ring.

This week I'm watching the grass turn green and waiting for the ground to firm up.

(Dude.  Boring.)

HEIDI THE HICK'S 2011 JUNO REPORT!!! NOW FEATURING THE YOUNGUNS!!

Yeah I know it's about three weeks late.  Blame the intermittent net.  Anyways I'm baaack!  And I brought our kids!

We did something special this year, what with the Juno Awards being held in Toronto, less than 2 hours away from home...we brought our kids, because they have been patient with this crazy biz and deserve to have some fun!!!

Ladies and gentlemen, I officially present... OUR YOUNGUNS!

The Girl, fka Tribble, aka Annyong, me and the Boy, aka Bucky.

And here they thought we were getting to the show in a big ol tacky SUV limo just for fits and giggles... Oh hey look, guys, what's this?  A crowd of screaming people?  Cameras?  BEN MULRONEY???

But I'm jumping ahead here.  Let me take you to the Saturday evening Gala Awards Dinner Event Where We Sit With Other Engineers And Behind The Scenes People!

The actual award itself is different this year.  

Now the little glass guy is in his/her/its own little pod!

I think there are 30 awards given out on the Saturday night.  It's not televised.  That's probably a good thing since there are bottles of wine on the tables, which miraculously get replaced when empty.  It could turn into the Golden Globe Awards at any time!  Lookout!  

Generally everybody behaves themselves.  It's quite amazing considering how the music biz is full of people who are of the slightly crazy, possibly flaky, most likely unable to follow directions, probably ADHD creative artist types!  (and those types of people usually are my favourites!)

This is Kellylee Evans.  She was so thrilled with her Vocal Jazz award...

...that she started singing right there at the podium.  

What a beautiful moment!

This young lady's first name is Nicole, and since I didn't keep my program and have a bad memory, I can't tell you what her last name is.  I can tell you that she sang kd lang's "Constant Craving," and that it felt like approximately 2000 people held their breath.

And she got a standing ovation.  

The young fella with the guitar at centre stage is Justin Nozuka.  I'd heard of him, but hadn't heard him.

He's great!  I plan to hear more of him in the future. 

The evening was hosted by two of my favourite Canadian broadcast personalities.  (Is that what they're called?  What's the actual job title??)

Jian Ghomeshi and Seamus O'Regan.  Or as Seamus said, the "Persian-Irish Wayne & Shuster."  Maybe you have to be Canadian and over 40 to get that joke.  It made me chuckle.

I watch Seamus most mornings on Canada AM.  He's from Newfoundland.  Automatically likeable!

I don't catch Jian's show nearly often enough, which is a shame because I think he's awesome. I'm a fan.

Before announcing the Recording Engineer of the Year award, he called out, "So how about those Engineers?" and our entire table erupted - yes, ERUPTED - into vigorous cheers!  (Later that night my husband got a chance to personally thank him for the recognition!)

And who did the award go to?

The multi-talented, world rocking Kevin Churko.

Not only a seriously great recording engineer/ producer, but also a genuinely good person. In a bearded, boots-wearing haavy kind of way.

Four words here, people: two Ozzy Osbourne records.  

Serious admiration for this guy!

Generally, the big televised awards are what people pay attention to.  This is where the Big Stars are dragged out.  This year's host was Drake, who apparently is a really really really big deal.

I know nothing about rap, so I can't comment on that, but the guy handled the telecast hosting job extremely well!  He was charming and kept things moving, and even did a bit of singing.  Also, he went to an old folk's home to learn how to roll.  I guess.  He even brought them to show.  That was nice.

What a nice young fella.

So we snuck the red carpet thing onto our kids, which was AWESOME!  That was, for Jethro and I, the best part of the entire weekend!

Of course, the organizers of the event are very careful to NOT get us non-famous people anywhere in the line of a camera.  It's actually kind of funny how they avoid us.  

A girl on the other side of the barrier leaned over and asked, "How did you get there?"  I told her my husband's a Juno-winning recording engineer.  I didn't tell her it wasn't this year, but anyways.  And then she said, "Oh you're so lucky, you get to meet Drake!"  I couldn't help but laugh.  

"We're not getting anywhere near him," I told her.  

So my kids didn't get to meet the guys in Hedley.  Annyong especially was disappointed.

Aw well.  Can't have everything.  

However we did walk past the Barenaked Ladies!  

Did I mention it was freakin' cold that day? Good thing they weren't bare nekkid for real.  Of course, there had to be a few women wearing ridiculous outfits with way too much skin showing for a late March Canadian afternoon.  And all of these skimpy outfits were white. I didn't get to actually see any of this, what with us being shooed through the line, but I saw the pix the next day.  It made me giggle.  It's so hard to look sexy when you're freezing.  Not that I'd know.

So at one point I was looking at this man, tall guy, maybe in his 50s, with wavy dark hair, slightly grey, and wearing glasses.  Who is that man?  Do I know him?  Where do I know him from?  Entertainment lawyer?  Label owner?  Stellar musician I've met over and over and keep mistaking him for someone else?  Who is this guy?"

It was Robbie Robertson.  

Geez.  

At least I recognized Randy Bachman. 

We did have a close encounter with the Worldwide Famous...

...but I'll save that for last.

So my kids finally got a look at what happens while people at home are watching commercials.  As it turned out, not much, this year.  Forty years worth of Juno footage in 2-minute clips.  No comedians, nobody on the stage warning us about seat sitters taking our spot if we get up to go to the can.  

Down With Webster opened the show, and I quickly decided that they're one of those bands who are fun on a screen but electrifying in person. 

I think there are about eight or 17 guys in this band, not counting the dudes in the back in marching band outfits while pretending to be playing tubas.

This is the THING in Canadian music these days.  Bands with like, 23 of your best friends.  I counted eight people in Arcade Fire the first time they picked up an award, but later when they performed I think there were 11 people. Or maybe 17.  Heck it might have been 25, it was hard to tell.  

Later when Broken Social Scene played, I almost went dizzy trying to count everybody.  Ten or eleven?  Twenty-seven?  Hey that's fun and all, but maybe, when there's a guy on stage who's just clapping behind a microphone... do you think maybe somebody has a hard time saying no to their friends who wanna be in a band???

Now I confess, I'm not an Arcade Fire fan.  But I will say that they rocked the place.  I mean, I wouldn't say they rock, necessarily, but they totally threw themselves into the performance with energy and passion!

I still hate the frontman's hair.

Deadmau5 has the solution for pesky hair problems. 

Yeah we caught a glimpse of him outside before the show and I said, "Kids, look!  He's wearing his Formal Dress Head!"  Check out the look on Buck 65's face.    

And then Bryan Adams showed up to give Shania Twain a Hall of Fame award.  

There was so much Worldwide Famous on that stage that the universe almost collapsed under the weight.  

Measha Bruggergosman presented an award with two of the Great Big Sea guys, and was smart enough to tell us to protect our ears before naming the J Biebs. 

Holy screaming girls.  

I mean just wow.

The kid wasn't even there - the girls screamed deliriously at a video of him saying thanks.  Wow.

At some point we had a big medley or two.  

There are now 40 years worth of tributes and recognition and sing-along classics, man.  If we'd forgotten some of those songs and artists we were reminded.  Dude.  Neil Young was there.  In person.  

He showed up with his buddy-producer, Daniel Lanois.  Look at these two!  It's like they called each other first!  What a pair!

They even appeared to be wearing the same clothes the next day, when Neil Young received his Humanitarian Award.  What practical dudes.  They must travel light.  Smart.

That's a whole lotta grizzled coolness on one stage eh?

Hedley performed, and that always makes me happy because they are so exciting live!  

I enjoy this band maybe even more than I should.  If you get a chance to see them live, go!!!!  They will rock you and your world, at the same time!

Jacob's piano was all lit up from the inside.  Cooool.  

Tokyo Police Club were pretty good!  

They still look like they're in high school!

Two-thirds of Rush presented an award.  

What distinguished gentlemen of rock.  Geddy Lee, do not ever cut that hair.  

So to finish off the show, an interesting act called Chromeo wheeled their lady-legs keyboards out for something called, very accurately, "Hot Mess." 

What does it say about the Girl and I that we found Sarah McLaughlin's song to be nice but we thought Chromeo was hilarious and brilliant?

I mean, if this is about entertainment, this is it.  This is nothing if not entertaining.

Guitar face and everything.  They even had a line of Robert Palmer style backup lip sync/ dancers.

Remember I mentioned a big huge moment on the red carpet?  

We were standing there gawking around when a group of men in black - I'm not kidding, actual men in black with those little earpieces - cruised past us.  I heard one saying in a low voice, "...and the name is Tanya Kim" which made me perk up my ears, because I watch Tanya Kim and Ben Mulroney after lunch!  And see this picture? This is that day!!!  

And the six guys in black?  They swept past, and disappeared, and Tanya Kim was standing on a platform right in front of us with Shania Twain.

For real people, like a few feet away from us. 

This was taken with an iPhone, so does this show how close we were?  

Annyong said she smelled really nice.

Of course I suggested she have her picture taken "with her."  The kid was a big little fan when she was ten!  

Now she can say she is in a picture with Shania Twain.

And let me say, this woman is petite and seriously as beautiful as expected.  She's truly lovely.  

Bucky got in on the photo-bombing.  

I looked at this picture all blown up and I'm sure she's looking over sideways at us.  

Yikes.

After the show, the kids retired to our hotel room for cable TV and a few rowdy games of Dutch Blitz.  We'd come back from whatever label party we showed up at, creeping in at 2 or 3 am, and there were our teenagers, sleeping away.  In the morning we'd compare our evenings.  

And that, my friends, was our family adventure to the Juno Awards.  

I'd have to say, overall, the whole thing was a bit of a non-event, sadly.  I think it's a combination of shrinking budgets at the record labels, and Toronto.  There's just too much going on in the city to compete with the Junos.  And I think Toronto is too cool to be seen getting excited about much of anything.  Also?  Unseasonably cold this year!

I do hope it gets moved around to other cities again. It brings an excitement, and it's different every year. But being in Toronto meant no plane tickets, so we could afford to bring our kids.  It made all the hassle and expense of spending the weekend there totally worth it!  

(for a look at a lot of great press photos from the weekend, go to Upvenue!)