Go ahead and park your * team of Belgians and sleigh *snowmobile *tractor *hot rod pickup truck *dog sled over there beside the barn, and you smart fellas can put your camels under the roof.
(Oh hey, thanks anonymous cowboy! Whoever you are, thanks for letting me use your nice picture without permission!)
Welcome to the Old Homestead.
Come on into my MUDROOM.
Yep. Mudroom. Because my Mudroom is always this spotlessly clean and neat and pretty, of course.
You can hang your *thermal coveralls *snowsuit *wise man uniform *cowboy hat *woolly earflaps hat and maybe even your *snowshoes.
(If you rode in here on a donkey, please get comfortable and be assured that I do have a nice place for you to settle in, in case you need to make this an extended stay, and I'm ready to tear up rags and boil water if necessary. Just saying.)
I have a new hired man this year. I'm really excited because he's wonderful. His name is Edward. He's very shy and a little odd, but he's cute in a slightly dangerous way. I can't quite put my finger on it.
But anyways, he's an artist with tree trimming and his ice sculptures are amazing!
I see you've dressed in your best outfit for my little party. That's right nice of you!
Just be careful where you're pointing your new present there okay?
I really put a lot of work into my decorating this year.
I'm friggin exhausted but it's okay because I will be fortified with...
BLOG NOG!!!!
It's the BEST! You can guzzle all you can tolerate, and it's completely magically calorie free!
I even have some in fancy martini glasses. wink wink.
(Shhhhhhh......)
You won't feel a thing, it's okay.
Cheesy.
Hey, wanna hear something weird? Apparently, in some alternate universes, "veggies and dip" is called "crudités"
I'm just saying, that's kinda weird, I think. But either way, can't overeat at my blog party!
I have no idea what's in the little presents on the plate. Not even sure where it came from. I'm sure Edward didn't put them there. (He's nervous about handling paper.)
Please step into my library! Like I said, I went all out this year. You should have seen me on the ladder with all this green and red stuff around my neck. I should have had a couple of those camels to stand on. But you can't trust a camel, can you? Maybe it's a good thing I had a stepladder. And hadn't busted into the imaginary rum-nog-blog.
Ha, look at this, I have pine needles in my hair.
It goes well with the bits of hay....
You might get accidentally on purpose lost in here for awhile. I have a nice reading lamp here too!
So because I wanted to go really big with the whole thing this year, I mean huge, I decided to get some really big Christmas balls. We all love big balls right?
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
So shiny!!!!
Guys, I put up new wallpaper. I decided to be FABULOUS. Sit down, man, those chairs are so comfy you will sink down to your elbows. Let me hand you your blog-nog-rum-punch.
I got every shade of purple and pink right down to the FABULOUS Christmas tree in the corner.
(In real life, our Christmas tree looks more like this...
...and we cherish it!)
So now moving from FABULOUS to FANCILY FORMAL, the table is set....
I will probably be the first person to spill something. It ain't a party until I send a puddle across the table.
But we might be too busy carousing to sit down and eat!!!
Let's sing!
YOU'RE A MEAN ONE, MR GRINCH!
Who knows all the words??????
Here's a question: Why do we always watch The Sound Of Music at Christmas? I'm not complaining. I LOVE that movie. I watch it every year. I grew up watching it at my Grandma's house with my cousins, every year. And yet I can't remember if there's any actual Christmas in it.
I might have to write my own version of My Favourite Things, involving thermal coveralls and fleece lined mittens.
What's your favourite Christmas movie?
Surprise me.
Okay, it's Grinch Time.
I just read a mind boggling article in Canadian Mennonite about how the Grinch went through a restorative justice reconciliation that transformed him. THINK ABOUT IT. He stole all their stuff. Everything. Didn't leave a crumb. (The crumb that was too small for a mouse doesn't count.) Just a few bent nails and wires. And they still held hands and sang on Christmas morning because it's not about stuff.
I think we kind of stop there and figure that's our lesson. It's a good lesson. But, there's more.
THE WHOS IN WHOVILLE INVITED THE GRINCH OVER TO SHARE THE ROAST BEAST.
The never glared at him or gave him heck for stealing all their stuff. They just forgave him, no questions asked, and let him carve the roast beast.
Clearly, the Whos are Mennonite.
I'm not sure if that's what the article was saying. I think something like that. Anyways trust me it was a good article.
Also I'm turning 43 this year.
I brought some of my fellow Christmas babies too!
Annie Lennox
Helena Christensen
LEMMY
(technically he's a Christmas Eve baby but close enough.)
And Jesus, who is so close to flashing us a peace sign.
(technically he wasn't really born on December 25, probably, but I'm sticking with it.)
Alright, eat drink be merry, sing as loud as you can, and remember, I'll be here all day! Bring all your rowdy friends!
MERRY
CHRISTMAS
EVERYBODY
19 comments:
OMGosh! Am I the FIRST PERSON at the Partaaaaaaay??? The place looks Grand, Heidi! I think I'll get a nog and sit by the fire. Everything is fabulous. Merry Christmas Heidi!
Jules! So good to see you here! I'll make sure you don't get lost in the old mansion here. Just yell if you're not sure what fabulous fireplace room you're in. I'll send Edward to find you. You'll have to carry your own nog but he's very polite.
Enjoy the party and enjoy your Christmas!!!
Thanks for inviting me, I'll try not to over do the blog-nog and dance naked with the leg lamp shade on my head.
I've heard so much about your parties, but its the first time I've ever been allowed to come. So excited! The place looks wonderful, and your friend...to die for!
Merry Christmas Heidi!
Hi Cindy D! Thanks for joining us! And if you need to dance, the lampshade is perfect - I'm sure we'll all have a turn wearing it! The night is young...
Sorry for leaving a puddle in front of the fireplace. I was still defrosting after 24 hours loss of power due to the ice storm.
The place looks absolutely fabulous. You have done a marvelous job, really. By some quirk of coincidence, I wore a smoking jacket of the same pattern as your new wallpaper, and people didn't notice me for the longest time, until Edward found me and made me stand against a blank wall.
My only disappointment was that duck dynasty wasn't invited. He would have had us all laughing trying to get his foot out of his mouth.
I passed on the Sound of Music and hid out in the library with some of my characters. Yes, I did smuggle in my psychic guy, and the readings he took of your guests were highly (ahem) entertaining. Wait until I tell you what we discovered about Annie...
The blognog was delicious. You mean... there was rum in the mix? That explains it!
Uhhh btw Heidi ... where are the conveniences? Did someone forgot to include them in the layout? Hope to Monday it's not (country style) outside.
Merry Christmas
Oh Paul, get warm! (We were so lucky, only three hours powerless, and that was scary enough!!)
Well anyways, your fabulous camouflage worked beautifully, and now I expect all that unobtrusive observing to show up in a story! I might need to borrow that jacket. Did Edward get hold of it?
You know what, I have not had the opportunity to get to know the sick dynasty. I feel like I'm missing out on something. Didn't the do a Christmas record this year????? Somebody must report on this to me!!!
...there's always rum in the blognog. ALWAYS.
Oh, also - couldn't get a good pic of the facilities. My new hired man was trimming icy branches off the tree beside the outhouse, so at least it's safe in there, and of course elaborately decorated so you have something nice to look at during your nature break. Aaaaaand the indoor facilities are even more festive than usual. I wrapped everything in tinsel. The toilet tank lid hardly fits anymore, with all the tinsel padding. Careful when you turn on the tap. Unbelievable how tinsel sends water flinging everywhere. Good thing you can dry out by the fire. Again.
Whew Heidi, what a great party. Too bad the weather must have kept most folks from coming by, either that or they were a pretty quiet bunch. Thanks for hosting; once again you've outdone yourself. Thank Edward for me as well. He's such a great guy and wonderful help. I think I would have stayed by that fire the entire time if he hadn't gotten me up and out once or twice.
A Happy and safe New Years to you and yours!
Love your mud room, Heidi! and all the other interesting stuff. Hope you and your family had a great Christmas.
P.S. Do you have an image of the Punkydoodles Corners sign? I need one.
That was the first time while sitting I gazed through a picture window of the outhouse to the unfettered view of the outside. The pristine snow made me shiver and I hurried my business. I'm still finding strands of tinsel in my laundry.
You were asking about the jacket? Yes, Edward took it, promising to have it cleaned after one of your guests spilled some eggnog on the lapel. He said he had the right kind of Oxyclean to remove the stain.
Oh, btw, I borrowed one of your books from the library and must remember to bring it back. I actually forgot the title and "lost" it in my stack at home, until I found some pine needles in it to identify it.
I managed to duck all the hanging mistletoe, but could not puzzle the riddle of the blue balls. Was that some allegorical reference or leftover disco balls? Be sure to compliment the DJ for me, he was first class until he got wasted and started playing heavy metal (for Christmas?). I hope he is soon out of detox. Now I'm busy preparing a list of NY's resolutions. If I do it now, I won't have to rush it later.
Hey guys! Feel free to drop by anytime, I'll keep the imaginary door open. (The weather around here in southwestern Ontario has been treacherous and there won't be computers and gadgets running without electricity!) anyways it's been good eh?
Hey Paul, was your jacket a different shape when Edward gave it back???
I think the DJ was digging into such classics as "mistress for Christmas" by AC/DC and "Christmas with the devil" by Spinal Tap. Also he may have going heavy on the rum... Happy holidays!!! Hahaha!
I got back swatches... but at least they were clean
I'm pretty late for the party, but it looks like the festive decorations are still up. I've actually been to your parties before, but I usually just hide in the corner and suck down the blog-nog. It's so yummy! Anyways, just wanted to let you know I mentioned you on my blog (www.jonesacr.com) because your awesome party gave me an idea. Looking forward to more parties!
Thank you for stepping out to say hi! No such thing as being late for a party around here. And now I'll pop over to join the party at your place, haha!
Sorry I'm late! This is the only party I actually made this year, am so glad to be at my third, yes third round of blog nog with you!
It was a rough go, but we made it.
YOU are never late - any time is good!
Yep, we made it. Again. (Clink the nog glasses!)
Happy New Year Heidi!
(knock, knock)
Sorry to come again to bother you, but did someone find my cell phone? I was sitting in the wing chair and perhaps it slipped by the cushion. Could someone please have a look?
Happy New Year to one and all !
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